This is a really clear and illuminating piece. I relate so much. And it's such a relief to read about how common my experiences are amongst autistic people. It has always been very difficult for me to introduce friends from different groups, because of what a chameleon I am. It's freaky how I can adapt! It used to see it as a super skill, but lately I've been more trying to focus on who on earth I really am.

A therapist asked me a good question once, which helped. "Who is Chelsey, just for herself?" I try to reflect on this, and am getting better at taking it seriously.

I love being adaptable, but in the past I was adaptable to the extent that I didn't have any wants or needs of my own. Or rather, I was so out of touch with them that I may as well not have had any.

Nowadays, I am giving myself that space to work out what I want and need. Getting my diagnosis is helping me to do that, too.

A really useful piece, thanks.

Chelsey x